How Well Balanced Is Your Life Wheel (part 3)

In the last post, we discussed some of the concerns people have had regarding the occupational spoke on their life wheel. But not all problems and not all the joys in life are because of work. Today's post will discuss the physical, social and spiritual aspects of the life wheel.

For the physical aspect of your life wheel, you want to include some physical activity, at least on a weekly basis, although more frequently would be better. The physical activity you choose should be appropriate for you and something you enjoy enough to keep at it. So, although I would love to ride a bike, it has been so long since I rode, that at this stage in life, I might do more harm than good for my body. In addition to keeping physically active, you should be sure to eat healthy and get a sufficient amount of sound sleep. Some people find that if anything is off/out-of-balance in any aspect of their life that their sleep is immediately effected. So they may have a fairly immediate signal that all is not well - although they still may have to figure out what is wrong.

The social spoke on your wheel encompasses the social - not-work related contacts - that you maintain. You may have some acquaintances that are just that and others who are truly friends. On those days when you're feeling down and don't really feel like 'faking it', your true friends will understand and will offer to help or, at least, to listen. If you are between jobs, resist the temptation to hide out - you need to continue to have social contacts. The same applies to those who are in retirement. Retirement should be from work, not from life. You really need to maintain some relationships through retirement in order to maintain the social aspect of your life wheel.

The spiritual spoke on your life wheel could include spending time appreciating nature, meditating, reading, or other spiritual activities. This allows you to tap into your beliefs/your source of strength. Even when things are going well in your life, you should still devote some time to the spiritual aspects of life. So often, it is when things are not going well that we draw on our spirituality, which can certainly be a source of inspiration and consolation, but I would encourage you not to reserve that just for the difficult times in life.


Mary Ann Davis is a Licensed Professional Counselor (LPC) in private practice providing coaching and counseling for life's transitions; including career change or job search, planning for retirement, loss of job, coping with an empty nest, preparing to return to work or school, and other life planning issues. She meets with individuals in person and via telephone helping to find solutions to problems related to life transitions. Mary Ann is certified as a Master Career Counselor (MCC) by the National Career Development Association, a Life/Work Counselor by the National Employment Counseling Association, and is a Distance Credentialed Counselor (DCC). Please visit her web site at http://www.yourcareerplan.com/ for more information on her services.

To contact Mary Ann, please call (513) 665-4444 x3 and leave a personal and confidential message or send an email to YourCareerPlan@cinci.rr.com.

How Well Balanced Is Your Life Wheel (part 2)

In the previous post we posed this question and discussed some of the issues related to your current work situation and your life goals, as part of the Occupational spoke on your life wheel. In addition to looking at the work you are doing, or have been doing, you want to consider whether or not you are using the skills that you most enjoy using. Certainly, many jobs have changed over the last several years, along with the multiple changes in technology. If your job no longer requires the skills you really enjoy using, you may need to determine if there are other situations in which those same skills would still be needed, or if those skills would be used in other occupations. In some instances, the skills may not be much in demand - or at least not in the kinds of jobs in which you could make a decent living. Again, are there ways in which you could still apply those skills, or is it time to read the writing on the wall that those skills are now outdated?

Also, it may be a matter of personality clashes or personal conflicts with your co-worker(s) or supervisor(s) that cause you to be unhappy with your current work situation. If that is your situation, again, I encourage you to consider whether the situation is manageable or whether you need to start preparing for a change. You also need to consider whether your current career goals fit with your life and your plans. If you have not done so, you should visualize some aspects of your work future and determine if your current path will contribute to your achieving your career goals and life plans.

I believe it is important to look at the source(s) of your frustration/unhappiness with the occupational spoke on your life wheel, if that is the case. The topic of your life wheel will be continued in the next post. You also want to be sure that during your working years that you make time for other spokes on your life wheel. Individuals who don't do that tend to have a much more difficult time coping with retirement. For many, that is because without their work, they feel as though there is nothing left in their lives.


Mary Ann Davis is a Licensed Professional Counselor (LPC) in private practice providing coaching and counseling for life's transitions; including a career change or job search, planning for retirement, loss of job, coping with an empty nest, preparing to return to work or school, and other life planning issues. She meets with individuals in person and via telephone helping to solve problems related to life transitions. Mary Ann is certified as a Master Career Counselor (MCC) by the National Career Development Association, a Life/Work Counselor by the National Employment Counseling Association, and is a Distance Credentialed Counselor (DCC). Please visit her web site at www.YourCareerPlan.com for more information on her services.

To contact Mary Ann, please call (513) 665-4444 x3 and leave a personal and confidential message or send an email to YourCareerPlan@cinci.rr.com.

How Well Balanced is Your Life Wheel?

If you are feeling frustrated or out of sorts, but aren't quite sure why, you may want to consider how well balanced your life wheel is. A life wheel covers the various aspects of one's life - the occupational, physical, spiritual, social, emotional, and intellectual pieces that fill your days, weeks, and years. For many of my clients, it is the occupational spoke on their life wheel that is out of whack - or that throws all the other pieces out of alignment. They are no longer (or maybe never were) satisfied with aspects of their work or they have grown to dislike something(s) about their work situation. So we try to identify a change that would address those concerns.

For one thing, you want to be sure that your work fits in somehow with your career goals and life plans. Think about what you want to accomplish during your life and what you would like to contribute to the world. At least in some small way, what you are doing should be helping to get you where you want to go or add to making this the kind of world in which you want to live. If this is not obvious in your work situation, then you should look for ways to add that to some other aspect of your life.

Certainly if there is no longer a good fit between you and your work, that can make you miserable, or at least more tired than you need/want to be. If that is your situation, I encourage you to spend some time and energy breaking down the situation, to see where the problem(s) lies. It could be that your day-to-day tasks have changed and no longer involve enough of the things you enjoy doing or find stimulating or challenging. In that case, I encourage you to consider if there are ways you could return some of that joy or replace some current tasks with others that would be more satisfying.

In reviewing your current work situation, it could be that the organization/your employer has switched gears and it's values are no longer in line with yours. If that is the case, I encourage you to consider if enough of your work values are being addressed to make you feel needed and comfortable. If not, then you may wish to prepare to launch a new job search or to discover a new career direction or find other ways to satisfy some of the values that are most important to you. In my experience, it is often the values piece that causes individuals to search for something different in their work lives. I will continue with the occupational spoke of the life wheel in the next post.


Mary Ann Davis is a Licensed Professional Counselor (LPC) providing coaching and counseling for life's transitions; including a career change or job search, planning for retirement, loss of job, coping with an empty nest, preparing to return to work or school, and other life planning issues. She meets with individuals in person and via telephone. Mary Ann is certified as a Master Career Counselor (MCC) by the National career Development Association, a Life/Work Counselor by the National Employment Counseling Association, and is a Distance Credentialed Counselor (DCC). For more information on her services, please visit her web site at http://www.yourcareerplan.com/.

To contact Mary Ann, please call (513) 665-4444 x3 and leave a personal and confidential message or send an email to YourCareerPlan@cinci.rr.com.

Are You Always 'On Call'?

I have noticed more people driving or walking around with one of those headsets or actual cell phones up to their ear. Putting the legal issues aside, that is probably not sensible. Granted, some of those calls or messages really are emergencies and some may be pertinent to where the receiving person is headed, but I can't believe they all are.


We seem to have become a nation of people - many of whom are always 'on call'. If they are not making or receiving phone calls, they are sending or reading text messages or email. With the advances in technology, you don't even have to be at home or on a computer to do that these days. I am not trying to suggest that technology is a bad thing, but that some people might want to consider cutting back on their frequency of use.


Unless your job absolutely requires you to be tuned in all the time, I encourage you to ease back on your connectivity. You do not have to be always 'On Call'. I get the feeling that some people think because they can be in constant contact, that they should be. That is not my approach to life, or what I call 'living'. All the technological gadgets are nice, but they should have a place in your life that is something less than 24/7. If you have to check email while your coffee is brewing and before you eat breakfast, that probably not good. If you can't drive from home to work without making or receiving a phone call, that is probably not good. If you can't/don't carry on an actual conversation with a person - in person, that is not good. If all those contacts are work related, then you need to think about what kind of pay you get for all of the hours you spend at work and/or doing work-related activities, including checking your messages, etc. when you are not actually 'at work'. In many cases, the pay does not come close to being appropriate for the amount of time devoted to the tasks that fall in your work-related realm.


Think about the amount of time you spend connected to those gadgets and compare that to the amount of time you spend actually connecting with people - not just communicating, but actually making a connection in person or via actual telephone conversation. Do you like the ratio that you came up with, or is it very lopsided? If you don't like the numbers you came up with, resolve to do things differently. Make this the year when you stop being constantly 'on call'.





Mary Ann Davis is a Licensed Professional Counselor (LPC) in private practice, providing coaching and counseling for life's transitions; including career change, job search, planning for retirement, returning to work or school, non-retirement planning, and other life planning issues. She is certified as a Master Career Counselor by the National Career Development Association; a Life/Work Counselor by the National Employment Counseling Association, and is a Distance Credentialed Counselor (DCC). Ms. Davis meets with individuals in person and via telephone. Please visit her web site at http://www.yourcareerplan.com/ for more information on her services.


To contact Mary Ann, please call (513) 665-4444 x3 and leave a personal and confidential message or send an email to YourCareerPlan@cinci.rr.com.

Volunteering

I have referred to volunteering in previous posts, but wanted to make a point of addressing it today. This week, April 10 through 16, 2011, has been designated as National Volunteer Week in the US. That gives us an opportunity to express gratitude to all of those individuals throughout the country who volunteer in one way or another. If you are among them, please accept my thanks, as well. But as a career counselor and coach, I can also tell you, and from personal experience that volunteering can also be an excellent way to fulfill some of your own dreams or objectives. I was talking with a friend several years ago and mentioned a major I had in college (one of several) and that I was discouraged from pursuing it. She suggested a way that I could still do something related to that interest, if I wanted to, and she suggested an organization I might work with who could use someone with my abilities and interests. I thought about it, researched it, and volunteered. Now, five years later, I am still volunteering and I can honestly say, I still love the work I do as a volunteer. I do enjoy it enough that I do it without financial gain (pay)! I have encouraged clients to consider doing volunteer work in order to gain some experience in a particular type of industry or to hone their skills for a certain kind of work they would like to pursue. Also a volunteer, you generally have opportunities to sort of try things out to see how it fits for you. Whether it is working in a different industry or doing a different set of tasks, if you can try it out as a volunteer, there is generally less risk or less at stake than trying it out as an employee - particularly if it does not work out very well. Many of the clients I have worked with are looking for ways to bring some additional fulfillment to their lives and I encourage them to consider volunteering. Not only can volunteering be a good way to develop some skills and current experience in a particular area in preparation for a job change, it can also supplement your life/work on an ongoing basis. Sometimes a person doesn't feel like they can make a job or career change, at least not in the immediate future, but would like to be able to apply some of the skills they don't currently use in their work. Or a person whose interests are not being satisfied in their work situation might find a volunteer job that fulfills at least some of those desires. A person who has values that are not being met in their work may find an opportunity to volunteer that allows them to feel they are doing something to address some of the things that are 'close to their heart'. Volunteering doesn't usually have to be a full time job; the parameters vary depending on the circumstances. Many factors will vary depending on the type and extent of assistance you can provide and what the organization/agency/family/individual needs. If something is missing from your life, it may be that there is an opportunity to volunteer to help fill that space. Mary Ann Davis is a Licensed Professional Counselor (LPC) in private practice providing coaching and counseling for life's transitions; including career change, job search, retirement planning, returning to work or to school, coping with an empty nest, and other life planning issues. Mary Ann is certified as a Master Career Counselor (MCC) by the National Career Development Association, a Life/Work Counselor by the National Employment Counseling Association, and is a Distance Credentialed Counselor (DCC). She meets with individuals in person and via telephone. Please visit her web site at www.YourCareerPlan.com for more information on her services. To contact Mary Ann, please call (513) 665-4444 x3 and leave a personal and confidential message or send an email to YourCareerPlan@cinci.rr.com. To contact

Coping with the Job Search Roller Coaster (part 2)

In the last post, I talked about some issues related to conducting a job search in today's job market. We know that for most people, conducting a job search in a tight labor market is not an easy or fast process. Don't assume that everyone else has landed a new job in 2 or 3 months. These days, it could easily take 9 to 12 months, or longer to land in a new situation. If you have trouble coming up with leads or organizations to look into, you might try networking. To prepare for networking, start by making a list of everyone you know. Include not only the obvious family members and friends, but include others like your doctor, dentist, or instructor at the gym, other parents at your kid's soccer games, the person you chat with at the store or post office, etc. It may help to write a statement to help you in your networking efforts. Something like, "I want to do _____but I am having trouble because _________." Fill in those blanks as they relate to your situation. Then begin sharing your statement with people from your list and ask if they have any thoughts regarding it or suggestions for you. We know that most jobs that are filled are never advertised anywhere. So you should not spend all day looking through want ads or web sites. Since it is estimated that only 15 to 20% of job openings are advertised, you should not spend more than 15 to 20% of your job search time looking through ads. You should plan your time so that you do some networking or job search activities every day. Whether it is meeting with contacts or calling someone from your list, drafting letters, sending thank you notes, etc. For many people, it helps to create a daily schedule and set aside time to work on job search activities. Keep in mind that persistence is necessary when your search gets stalled - don't become a victim of discouragement. If you find you need help keeping motivated, identify at least three people you can call upon to help you refocus and get re-energized. If you feel your goal is too overwhelming and you can't seem to get started - identify three things you can focus on first - even if they are small things. It is important to keep all aspects of your life in perspective. Some people refer to this as 'counting your blessings'. So think of the things in life that you do have that you should be thankful for. Also, make sure you keep your life wheel as balanced as possible. Reward yourself for your efforts, for your abilities and your strengths. Mary Ann Davis is a Licensed Professional Counselor (LPC) in private practice providing coaching and counseling for life's transitions; including a job search or career change, retirement planning, coping with an empty nest, coping with loss of job, preparing to return to work or to college, non-retirement planning, and other life planning issues. She meets with individuals in person and via telephone. She is certified as a Master Career Counselor (MCC) by the National Career Development Association, a Life/Work Counselor (L/WC) by the National Employment Counseling Association, and is a Distance Credentialed Counselor. Please visit her web site at www.YourCareerPlan.com for more information on her services. To contact Mary Ann, please call (513) 665-4444 x3 and leave a personal and confidential message or send an email to YourCareerPlan@cinci.rr.com.

Coping with the Job Search Roller Coaster

A job search requires you to get 'psyched up' to update/write a positive resume and cover letter and to continue to pump yourself up as you prepare for networking and interviews. If things don't work out as you hoped, there is somewhat of a let down. But you can't afford to spend time feeling down because you must continue on with your search. Even in good economic times, a job search can be an emotional roller coaster because of the uncertainties. You get excited about the possibilities and at least somewhat disappointed or disheartened if it does not work out. In these times, that cycle may be repeated several times. Rather than letting that frustrate you over and over again, it is best to find ways to cope with that job search roller coaster. One of the difficulties some people face have to do with their situation and coping strategies they apply to it. No matter the reason you are conducting a job search, you should develop strategies to help you cope with that change. Dr. Nancy Schlossberg, author of Overwhelmed: Coping with Life's Ups and Downs, discusses coping with change and suggests you consider whether or not there is anything you can do to change the actual situation. Can you brainstorm a plan to help you make a change? Can you negotiate - perhaps when the change will happen, for example? Is there positive action you could take before the change actually takes place? This may have potential, even if you would be leaving your job involuntarily. Secondly, is there anything you can do to change how you view the situation or change? Instead of thinking of it as 'the end of the world' could you view it as providing you with an opportunity to do something different? Even if you can't view it as a positive, if you can think of the change as a neutral event in your life, that will help you to cope with it. Also, you are encouraged to find ways to take stress in your stride. Find ways to release some of those emotions, apply relaxation techniques, play, find some creative or physical outlets for your stress, etc. Although I have identified this post as related to a job search, the same suggestions apply to other transitions in life. We will address more on this emotional roller coaster in a later post. Mary Ann Davis is a Licensed Professional Counselor (LPC) in private practice, providing coaching and counseling for life's transitions; including career change and job search, as well as loss of job, retirement planning, coping with an empty nest, non-retirement planning, and other life planning issues. She meets with individuals in person or at a distance via telephone. Ms. Davis is certified as a Master Career Counselor (MCC) by the National Career Development Association, a Life/Work Counselor (L/WC) by the National Employment Counseling Association, and is a Distance Credentialed Counselor. Please visit her web site at www.YourCareerPlan.com for more information on her services. To contact Mary Ann, please call (513) 665-4444x3 and leave a personal and confidential message or send an email to YourCareerPlan@cinci.rr.com.